Mothering advice from an eight-year-old girl

I will disclose up front that my kids are amazing. We are so lucky to have been blessed with such wonderful kids that don't cause a lot of trouble or undue stress. So when we do have what we consider difficult days, we (I can confidently say it's not just me) can fly off the handle.*

[*No children were harmed during my soon-to-be described temper tantrum.]

Yesterday was one such tricky day. The kids let us sleep in, which is normal for a non-workday, but while we were dozing, we could hear them playing up in Max's room. It wasn't a surprise to discover the room was a mess with stuffed animals strewn about along with bakugan toys and other miscellaneous 'crap.' When I walked in to put something away, my foot fell onto a wet spot. I didn't think too much of it as Max hasn't quite figured out that spitting is limited to a sink or outdoors. I began to remind myself to talk to him about this...when my other foot landed on yet another wet spot. This time, the wet spot soaked into my sock. I leaned down to touch the carpet and discovered several wet spots. I asked Max why the carpet was wet. His response (typical for a youngster) was, "I don't know." I repeat the question louder and more distinctly but garnered the same response. Again the intensity of my tone and volume increased to the point that I was yelling, nay, screaming. Eventually, Cate came in. Between the two of them and I screaming for Kyle to come in the room, they admitted they were playing with their Cars car wash (do NOT buy this for your kid!) and got water all. over. the. place.

In addition to patting down the floor with several towels, sorting between wet and dry stuffed animals, removing pink stains and glittery fuzz from the carpet, we discovered a few animals that got hair cuts at the hands of a five-year-old boy wielding kiddie scissors. Ugh!

We got through the rest of the day with the children acting like cherubs, thanks to Grandma and Grandpa coming over for seven hours. But as it came to be bed time, the sassy little personalities returned. I asked Max a couple of times to get his pajamas on and he didn't move away from what he was playing with. That is when Cate, sometimes demonstrating maturity well beyond her years, began to school me:

"You know Mom, maybe if you asked Max in a kind voice and with a smile on your face, Max would do what you asked him to do. Like this--'Max? Would you please go get your pajamas on? It's time for bed.'"

Sure enough, that little rascal got up and got his pajamas on.

So I said, "Wow! You're right, Cate! You're going to be such a great mom someday." She said, "Yeah, I know. Which reminds me, I should go write down that suggestion so I don't forget when I do become a mom someday." And off she scampered to her room to write down Rule #1 on 'How To Be a Good Mom' in her notebook.

I did take the opportunity to ask her, "So Cate, do you think if I use a pleasant voice and put a smile on my face when I ask you to do something, will you do it right away?" She said, "Oh yeah, sure!" I followed up with, "And may I remind you what you told me if you don't do it right away?" She again replied, "Oh yeah, sure!"

My first opportunity to test her came quickly.

This morning, we were back into work week / out-the-door-quick mode. Cate had yet to take her allergy pill. So I told her, "Cate, it's time to take your allergy pill." She grumbled. So I said, "Cate? Remember last night the advice you gave me? I'm talking in a pleasant voice with a smile on my face asking if you would please take your allergy pill. Now would you please take your allergy pill?" She straightened up and took it without further complaint.

And just to be sure, this evening, even when she got particularly grumpy, I was able to pull out the kind voice, a smile on my face and remind her once again of my request, she did what I asked her to do with no additional complaints.

Damn, she's good!